I'm totally having one of those "what the crap am I doing with my life?!" moments. I have all these goals and things I want to accomplish and I'm just slowly rolling through life, doing none of them. What do I expect, success to just hit me in the face? I think it's time to take a long, hard look in the mirror and repeat the following: "Life doesn't work that way, sweetheart. GET YOURSELF TOGETHER!"
I mean, I don't think I'm a total failure or anything. I've got my stuff more together than some, actually a lot of, people I know. I'm just not moving fast enough to satisfy myself. This being said, I'm getting my act together, with this in mind:
The only one who can stop me, is me.
The title of this blog is something I keep coming back to. We all have our war. What does that mean to me? We all have something, whether big or small, that we struggle with. Sometimes these are small struggles and sometimes we have multiple battles going on. Whatever gets us down, pisses us off, interrupts our life.. we all have our war. So, what is mine? What beats the hell out of me and kicks me when I'm down? At this current moment.. I do.
Anyone who's followed this blog since the beginning knows that things in my life, especially emotionally, are extremely inconsistent. Not that there's something wrong with me emotionally.. I'm just very up and down, back and forth. I think pretty much everyone is that way at some point though. It's not easy trying to figure out what you want and who you want to be when life's constantly throwing curveballs at you. There are times when I'm overly optimistic and positive through whatever is going on and there are times when I'm the complete opposite. These times, when I beat myself up over things I can't control or fail to measure up to my own standards of myself, I am my own worst enemy.
I'm a pretty lucky person. I'm healthy, happy, have(I think)a pretty good head on my shoulders. I don't have a lot to complain about and I don't like to complain but some days just suck. For whatever reason, sometimes life just ain't grand. I have to learn to deal with these days without breaking myself down entirely.
Every single day is another chance to make yourself better. To start over and become exactly who you want to be. That's how I choose to look at life. If I don't have the day I wanna have today, there's always another day to try again.
Live for today.. hope for tomorrow.